President wrestles WWE flagship from Florida
President Trump has launched a sensational last-minute bid to move this Sunday’s WrestleMania event out of Florida and into the garden of the White House, according to an extremely credible source.
In a remarkable conversation between Donald Trump and WWE chairman, Vince McMahon, it was revealed that the President plans to erect a temporary stadium within The Ellipse, just south of the White House fence.
“They’ll come from miles. It’ll be full. I predict a million, million and a half people.” Trump said.
“It will be the biggest and best WrestleMania ever. Nobody puts on a better show than me. It’ll be on the internet, behind a paywall. I’ll make them pay for it. The best WrestleMania ever. You wait.”
The last-minute decision to move the annual wrestling extravaganza, now being dubbed CongressionalMania, from Orlando’s Camping World Stadium, has sparked criticism on fan message boards, with one contributor suggesting possible Russian influence:
“Something’s not right here.” One user posted. “Just don’t be surprised when Ivan Drago’s introduced as the secret lovechild of Andre the Giant and John Cena.”
Construction of the “million and a half” seat arena is set to start on Wednesday, leaving just four full days for completion before the first ringwalk.
McMahon is confident, although he is concerned about the impact of a law change requested by Trump himself:
“He asked us to come up with a new way of deciding matches.” McMahon explained.
“He has a problem with tapping – thinks it can be exploited by bad guys. It’s a big change to a cardinal rule and one we’re struggling to justify.”
Sunday will not be the first time Donald Trump has hosted the popular WWE showcase. He previously welcomed WrestleMania to his Trump Plaza Hotel & Casino in Atlantic City, in 1988 and 1989.
Official confirmation of his 2017 involvement is expected from the White House later this week.